oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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