how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize