i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
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