yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize