i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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