Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
