Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
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