Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
