Non-Jews are for practice
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
