He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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