This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
