Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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