Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
