sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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