that's an acceptable place to lick
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
