how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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