I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
