literally had 100 drinks last night.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
