Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
