If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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