I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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