so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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