I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My dick has a subreddit
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize