Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
