There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Also, beer. Big fan.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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