i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
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