were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
