just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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