i jhust puked up my retainher.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
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