I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
