i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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