You just made me feel so damn special
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
