As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Randomize
