I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
