i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
she peed on how many people?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I think I sprained my soul last night
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize