If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm way too hungover for life right now
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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