going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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