Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
