So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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