dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
