waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
