so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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