I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
