Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
