Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
