Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
