he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
