Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I have post one night stand depression
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize