carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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