can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
