Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
