some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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